Pigfarts: A Draco Malfoy Adventure
by ilessthan3redvines
Summary: Draco Malfoy is finally on his way to Pigfarts! And with someone very special accompanying him.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, A Very Potter Musical, and A Very Potter Sequel, nor am I affiliated with them in any way.**

**Enjoy (: **

_Draco was excited. Very excited. He was so excited that now, he needed to change his diaper. It took a while, but he finally got it. A rocket ship. What he had been waiting for ever since he was eleven. "This is it," he said, as he climbed into the rocket ship. "I'm doing it. I'm finally going to _Mars_." But, he could not go yet. He got out of the rocket and started heading back to Hogwarts. There was one last thing he needed to do..._

Hermione got off of the train with Ron and Harry, and walked towards the Hogwarts castle. Hermione had a feeling that this was going to be a very fantastic year as she got to the front of where she'd grown to call her second home. She couldn't wait to learn new things. Although she knew Ron and Harry were going to be a problem, she would try to help them. From a distance, she saw Malfoy prancing towards the castle, and she rolled her eyes.

_Such a little shit.._ she thought.

"Hey, Granger! Granger!" called Draco, running toward Hermione until he finally caught up with them. "Granger," he said, leaning against the nearest thing. "I am giving you a deal _right now_. How would you like to go with me to _Pigfarts_. Now, I know you may laugh," he said, falling then immediately rolling on the floor.

Hermione stood there and stared as Malfoy rolled all over the ground. "Draco, just shut up about Pigfarts. We all know it's not real!" she put her hands on her hips and said, "Besides, you don't even have a rocket ship." She began to walk forward again, into the huge castle.

"No, wait. Listen. It _is_ real!" he said, as he began pulling Hemione's arm. "And I do have a rocket ship. Just follow me." He frantically began to tug on Hermione's sleeve.

Hermione didn't want to go, but he was pulling on her arm painfully. She started to follow him. "Malfoy, just stop it! Sometimes you don't make any sense, now let go of me!" she said pulling her arm out of his grasp. As she did so, she looked up and saw a huge rocket ship sticking out over the trees. "Oh my.. Draco, how did you even buy that?" she said in awe.

"It's a beauty, isn't it?" he said, as he admired his rocket ship. "I didn't. Someone gave it to me. Now, are you prepared to take my deal?" he asked, hand stretched out.

"I don't know, _Malfoy_. Can I really trust you? Besides.. I can't just leave Ron and Harry. They're my best friends!" she looked at his outstretched hand hesitantly. _Should I go? Ron and Harry are always talking about how you're not important.. Right?_ she thought for a moment.

"Look, Granger. I don't know if you've noticed, but Potter and _Weasley_ don't really like you. They make fun of you, a lot," he told her. He hated to make Hermione feel bad, but he had to. It was the only way he was going to get her to come to Pigfarts with him. "Plus, studying at _Mars_. That could be a great new adventure for you," he added.

Hermione took one final look at Hogwarts, then took Malfoy's hand. She might not like him much but he was right about Harry and Ron. _It's time I get some kind of recognition!_ she thought loudly. "Alright, _Draco_," she said his name sarcastically. "Deal."

"Yay!" Draco shouted, nearly jumping into Hermione's arms. "Okay, now we might be a bit late. So we better hurry up and take off," he shouted, trying his best to climb into the rocket ship. Once he finally got in, he stretched out his hand to Hermione. "You ready?"

Hermione's eyes widened as she actually saw how big the rocket ship was. "Uh.. Y-Yeah." She took his hand and climbed in. "Malfoy... Do you even know how to control a rocket ship?" she said, looking around in disbelief. _I can't believe I'm doing this!_

"Oh, yeah. Sure." said Draco. The truth was, he had no clue. He closed the door and latched it. "Okay," he muttered to himself. "Let's see. Um..." Draco had no idea what to do, but he had to impress Hermione. Then, he did something that probably wasn't the smartest thing to do. He started pressing random buttons.

"Malfoy! What are you doing!" Hermione yelled as the rocket ship started shaking. "I don't think this is supposed to happen! And don't we need space suits!" She stumbled into the nearest wall as it shook out of control. She could feel it start to lift up. "Draco.. You did it! We're flying!" She ran over and hugged him from behind. "This is so cool!" Though, truthfully, she was very nervous that something was going to happen.

"Yeah, I did it!" Draco exclaimed, as he hugged Hermione back. Wait... Spacesuits! He knew something had been nagging him in the back of his mind. He carefully rolled over to the far left corner of the rocket ship and pulled out two worn out spacesuits from a bag. "Here," he said, as he handed one to Hermione. "Put it on! I completely forgot..."

Hermione hurriedly put it on, and it felt really bulky and weird. "Um, do we have to wear these inside of Pigfarts? It's really uncomfortable..." Hermione fidgeted awkwardly in the strange suit. _I don't think I could do this all the time.. _she thought, as she tried to put the helmet on without getting her bushy hair stuck.

"Oh, yes," Draco said, hurriedly putting his suit on as well. "We may have a series of docking bay doors surrounding Pigfarts, but if one of these doors fall, everyone in the school will die." Oh, how Draco loved showing his knowledge of Pigfarts. "So, we have to wear our spacesuits at all times. You know, just in case."

"Ah..." Hermione said, finally placing the odd shaped helmet on her head. "This is quite odd.. I mean, one second you're making fun of my drawing skills, calling me ugly, I'm getting in your face and yelling at you... And now, I'm going to space with you!" She couldn't believe her change of fate.

"Hahaha," he tried to laugh. "Well, you did all that with _Weasley_, too, eh?"

Hermione gave him a weird look. "What do you mean, _Malfoy_." She was in defense mode because she did kind of like him. "I did nothing with Ron..." She no doubt, was on a completely different subject than Malfoy, but she didn't know that.

"Well, you know," Draco said, starting to get a little bit uncomfortable. After all, he did hate talking about _Weasley_. "He does all of those things. And I'm pretty sure you've yelled at him before. I mean, c'mon." He laughed.

Hermione blushed as she realized what he was really talking about. "Oh. Y-Yeah... He was always making fun of me, b-but I know he was only joking. Harry, too. They didn't mean any harm.." She looked away, and walked to the nearest window. "Uh.. Malfoy. How do we know where we're going?"

"Oh- Uh... Don't worry about that, Granger. I've got it all under control," he lied. "Now, how do you steer this thing," Draco muttered to himself. "Ah, I see," he said, and began pressing buttons with arrows on them and got out his map to Pigfarts.

While Malfoy was trying to figure out how to steer the thing, Hermione walked around, looking at everything. "Hey, Malfoy.. Who exactly gave you this rocket ship?" she said, looking at huge painted on words that said, 'Property Of Lord Voldemort!'

"Oh. Uh, just someone," Draco replied, still looking at the map. "They promised me it in an Unbreakable Curse."

"Mhm... Is, uh, this someone _Voldemort_?" Hermione looked at him with disbelief. "I knew there was something weird going on that day he was destroyed." She groaned. "I really wish that Dumbledore would have listened to me about Snape. I knew there was something going on there, too!" She started pacing, talking to herself.

"Yes, and you should've seen his face when I made him my slave for the whole day!" Draco said, remembering the day fondly. "But now he is gone, and none of that can happen again. Oh, I think we'll be arriving at Pigfarts soon. I'm not sure, though. I don't think this map is in English," he said, turning it over. "So, I'm just going by the pictures. Oh, wait. No. It is in English."

Hermione rolled her eyes at him. "You better get us there before this thing runs out of fuel. Or we'll both be in trouble.." She walked over to help him with the map. "How can you tell where we even are?" she asked, studying the parchment.

"Oh, uh. I do my research," said Draco, who still had no idea what he was talking about. Right at that moment, he saw the most beautiful thing he had ever laid his eyes on. Mars! They were actually there! They made it! And Pigfarts wasn't too far up ahead! "Granger! We're here!" he yelled, as he landed the rocket ship.

Hermione's eyes brightened, as she hugged Malfoy once more. "This is so awesome, Malfoy! I can't believe we're here!" She jumped with joy. Though she was a bit upset that she had to wear the space suit all of the time.

"Okay, now we've got a bit of a walk or um... rather, a bit of a float," Draco said, as he stepped out of the rocket, "until we reach Pigfarts." _Oh this is soooo exciting,_ he thought. He was finally going to get to go to Pigfarts, and with the girl of his dreams.

Hermione followed Malfoy off of the rocket ship and almost had a panic attack when she found herself floating so easily. She hopped after Draco, trying to keep her balance. _We can't float away, can we? _she wondered. Soon they were nearing Pigfarts, and Hermione's stomach did back flips.

Draco was very excited, once again. Everything was going perfectly. Except he did need to change his diaper. He hoped nothing leaked through his worn out spacesuit.. "Well, we're here, Granger. We're finally here." Once they floated up the steps to Pigfarts, Draco knocked on the door. The door slid open, revealing a room made of glass. Draco knocked on the next door. There was a beeping noise and the door opened…

Hermione latched onto Malfoy's arm as they walked through the strange doors. "Wow..." she said looking at everything around her. She was speechless.

"Welcome!" beamed Rumbleroar, as Draco looked pretty speechless as well. "Ah! You must be little Dracula Malfoy. And this is the young lady you said may accompany you, am I correct? I have heard great things about you, Miss Granger. Now, let me show you to your dorms."


End file.
